Thinking About You Again

I thought about you again today
I couldn't help it
The thoughts came upon me like an emotion

I thought about the way you laugh
Always in such a humorous way
I thought about the way you smile
Always bright and beautiful

I thought about the way you act
Always with confidence, yet a hint of sensitivity
I thought about the way you embrace me
Always warm and welcoming

When I try to block you out
I always think to myself "well… maybe just a peak"
And I create a small crack in the wall
And these thoughts and feelings spill into my mind

I dreamt about you last night
I couldn't find out where you were
Even though we were in the same room
I couldn't find you

I was scared and desperate
Yet, I never questioned why I felt that way

We aren't together
We're just friends

Yet every time I think about you
My heart beats louder
Every time I see you
I catch myself staring

I want to watch the sky with you
I want to take pictures of the beautiful clouds with you
I want to run through the sprinklers with you
And I want to listen to music with you

But those things I can only do with you
Without you, they hold no meaning

The sky is just a bit sheet of blue
The clouds are just the same I see everyday
The water from the sprinklers is cold
And the music is just the same old lyrics

I wish I could tell you all of these things
I wish I could hold your hand again
I wish you were right here next to me

But I am too scared
I am a coward
I am a spineless worm
And all I can do is wait